Sep 29, 2009

Insignificant


Prayer is part of my daily routine. I try to say quick prayers here and there during the day, and save my longer conversations for bedtime. I pass a church on my way to work each day, and for a while they had the following words on their sign near the road, "Just tell the Lord Thank You." I loved that sign. It was a daily reminder of gratitude and praise. The message was there for so long that I still find myself thinking of those words when I pass by in the mornings.

In the past year or so, I've noticed that I have a hard time asking God for things.

Why should God listen to my prayers?

My small, petty requests...
-to be without fear when I fly,
-to take away my anxiety before a big presentation,
-to help me get through planning a wedding, and a marriage...

I know that God tells us to talk to Him. To ask of Him.

I seem to have trouble with this. I have no problem asking Him to help others, but I feel selfish asking Him to help me.

Why are my requests worthy of His time... my silly fears I ask Him to calm when He has already told me that I should not worry... ?

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

My requests are so insignificant compared to those of others. How can I ask Him to help me be disciplined to save money for a wedding when mothers cannot afford to feed their children? How can I ask Him to protect me when I walk to my car at night when children are being raped, abused, and forced to see hell in their night?

I cannot help but be filled with guilt in my requests to Him. I pray for others, not knowing their names and I praise Him for the home that I have been blessed to live in, for the food that I take for granted, and for the opportunities and experiences I have lived to enjoy.

I know that there is a deeper meaning to this and perhaps it's part of my awakening in Him - His way, His gentle way, of reminding me of His presence. When I think He is too busy or has forgotten me, I know He is there.
I know He is there because I am safe and I have enough.
For that, I praise Him!

3 comments:

shana said...

Thanks so much for a wonderful, though-provoking post.
Have a great day!
Blessings,
Shana in MN

Jill Foley said...

Great post...can't wait to read it again!

Elftea said...

I have been having th atsame feelings. I want to have peace in my heart but wondered if It was to petty to pray for.

"Sometimes I'd like to ask God why He allows poverty, famine, and injustice in the world when He could do something about it, but I'm afraid God would ask me the same question."
-Anonymous
You don't change the world by trying to change the world; you change the world by changing yourself.
-Gerry Straub